Em says there’s something about me that invokes a sense of “omg is he gonna be okay”

the melodrama is good actually

it’s like this thing you know

it’s not a problem really when couples fight

but when they stop fighting rather yknow

without things being resolved

that’s a doom say

people came into the christmas stream and called me a nigger

i rarely ever care, never bothers me

yesterday though, it bothered me, more than the transphobic comments

it uhhh it hurt my feelings! i suppose i was already raw because of christmas

lucretia was caught and killed.

i saw the trap and her body

i’m genuinely mourning a cockroach! very silly of me

everyone commented positively about the christmas make up but i hated my face even more than usual

the make up was great but it only made it more obvious to me all the ways in which i fail

yet still

with all that and everything else

there’s no melodrama

i’m simply feel the need to sleep

i just remembered

there’s a term in my native tongue

it translates to something like “crying into yourself” or “pouring tears into yourself” my mother always used to criticize it as a particularly toxic, really bad for you.

anyway, i can’t seem to speak any more

goodnight