reader in copenhagen who are you? and you in finland, zimbabwe, south africa,saitama, wainae, in fact any of you frequent readers, reveal yourselves to me, send me an email, i wish to know you.
Watching a retro rewind rinse repeat livestream of a Cartoon Network Saturday morning cartoon block that pre dates me. Saturday video entertainment system its called. Just caught the tail end of a GI Joe episode, now an early CGI transformers cartoon following a human teen - Kicker Jones and his group of omnicons, a merger group of former autobots and decepticons. There’s a lot of infighting within the group naturally, some weird allusions to racial tensions even.
It’s funny, now as an adult, I know that these cartoons are effectively 30 minute commercials for hasbro, so Im not too excited for the cartoons themselves and rather I get more excited when it cuts to the commercial breaks so I can see the cool bumper animations referencing video games and anime “watch a brand new duck dodgers - king piccolo arrives! - now you can join the mission with Kim possible kids meal toys! - get out, go play!verb- it’s what you do!”
You can’t pay me enough to sit through any sort of modern advertisement nowadays, especially online, but its a wholly enjoyable experience, the cartoons and commercials both, I wonder what changed with commercials and advertising agencies. Im sure I could think on it, read an article or two and write out some long dissertation on the ever more sinister and out of touch nature of advertising due to the progression of greed and late stage capitalism, but maybe sometimes its enough to just enjoy a thing, and not try to consume or intellectualize every aspect of it.
It’s a good way to spend a Saturday morning, Kicker Jones’ dad just dropped an entire cybertronian city on a massive group of attacking terrorcons, another faction outside of the autobot/deceptacon dichotomy. They ran and screamed for their lives as they exploded under the crashing city. Now a commercial for School of Rock, rated pg-13, premiering October 3rd. “NOTHING STOPS THEM! EVEN A DROP! STRAIGHT UP STRAIGHT UP! THEY DONT STOP~!” - hot wheels micro machines! Knights of the Zodiac- Saturday nights at 7!
I woke up a bit anxious, feeling some dread. My first mistake was scrolling online first thing and seeing all the disappointing, depressing news. Last night someone had texted me leading to an important discussion, I woke up to see they hadn’t responded to my message extending an olive branch. I really do hate this sort of thing the most, but as the English opening for Yu Yu Hakusho starts to play, I feel alright actually.
It’s strange to feel alright in this way, but I do and I know I shouldn’t, the Saturday morning cartoons are making it so, perhaps they’re satisfying a part within me that just wanted to watch cartoons. I loved cartoons growing up, I wanted to be an animator, sometimes still do. Something deeply rooted within me is perfectly content simply sitting here watching a commercial about Dexter getting into the wild world of fashion. I’m starting to recognize the patterns emergent in my cycles. I’ve felt pretty assured and confident in my renewed sense of staunch atheism over the last few days, coming out of that rather deep depressive spiral, yet two or so days ago, I’d once more started to see omens, the prayers I learned started to ring in my ears again, I was yet again, praying to Allah, “please give me a sign clear and obvious enough for someone as obtuse and idiotic as me, show me a sign and I will worship for the rest of my days! I promise I’ll head to a masjid AS SOON as I land back in Chicago!” Obviously, nothing came. The poignancy of being so desperate to serve was not lost on me, and neither was the surreality of speaking out loud to myself as I prepped to take a night time walk to 7/11.
“How about a cigarette on the way, it has after all been a while, a week? Two?”
“A cigarette??!!!?” I could feel an expression of disgust flash across my face. “I’m not a smoker, that’s the other one.”
Who exactly, is talking? Why is this conversation being had out loud in an empty room? And actually, yeah. How have I not once had the slightest craving for a cigarette after smoking so heavily at the starting days of this month?
I chose to stamp down the thoughts and head out. I somehow didn’t need to listen to music like I always do when walking outside somewhere. They’d been out of stock of my favorite bottled tea. Ito En Golden Oolong Tea, unsweetened so I can add just the perfect amount of honey to my bottle, but this time it was there, I bought two.
I bought two and everything was fine.
Now Saturday morning and my cartoons are on. I bottle of Oolong thawing from the freezer, Im going to watch Castle and draw. Turns out tickets for the temple I want to visit are incredibly cheap, I just have to be on the bus for an hour and a half to get there but that’s also fine. I’ll head to the library first I think. Im by myself, I have no one to talk to, Im not on any dating apps, and it’s fine.
Why is everything fine?
Why am I suspicious that everything is fine? What happened while I was gone?
“Where is my wife?”
“Let’s just enjoy the nice day where everything is fine, if some money comes along we can get some pho or Indian”
I’m waiting…. waiting… waiting
When is something going to explode? When is the hit going to come? When will the storm crash on to us? Why is everything fine?
“i wish to no longer desire beautiful women”
well, off topic but i agree
“it’s a sick nauseating feeling they inflict.”
do you think we do that to some people?
“not quite, i mean that girl with the curly bouncy hair just now”
ugh, i know dude.
